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Wednesday 30 January 2008

EVOL: Love in a Backward World

Posted in 娱乐与动漫 at 10:29 pm by 老貓 ·  · Comments · 

Written and directed by Chris Vincze, starring Rick Warden and Lucy Barker, produced by Wendy Bevan-Mogg, this amazingly beautiful short film won Platinum "Remi" award at WorldFest festival, Houston, Texas.

You may watch the film on Chris Vincze's homepage or on YouTube.

This article gives some account on the making of the film.

And just FYI, Rick Warden and Lucy Barker are in real life a married couple. 

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Monday 28 January 2008

浅思录(三)

Posted in 生活 at 10:33 pm by 老貓 ·  · 2 Comments · 

19、

这几天去学校时,总看见漂亮的月。从不那么圆到很圆再到不那么圆。每天名副其实地“披星戴月”上班,借机观察月相变化,也算一乐。

人生能见几回月圆?挂在天上的,常常忽略;想要看时,却寻不着了。

20、

实岁二十五岁半,虚岁二十七,不知觉间我竟也是奔三一族了。人生匆匆,人生营营,所求者何?

21、

今天终于去CISCO拍照做公务员卡,据说要三个月才能拿到。之前一直想要等办了PR再做,办了PR却又把这事忘了。

健忘往往是要后来才发觉的。

22、

在CISCO照相很快,几分钟的事情。然后我就奔赴母校——中正总校,代表老大去开一个会议。

中正是东区华文教育中心。东区有小学、中学和初级学院共86所,这些学校的主任和代表老师在讲堂里倒也算济济一堂。

我到讲堂外面签了到,转身一看,却是当年中四的级任黄老师。

去年,九月我到丹戎加东中学开会后,顺路到母校一趟,因是周六,只见到了黄老师。她是东区华文中心的主任,所以很热心地带我到设在中正校内的该中心活动处参观,还观摩了小一学生的专题作业展。

今天黄老师见到我,怀疑地看着我,以为我是碰巧回母校看看,没有想到我是来开会的——“你今天是来……?”

“我今天是代表学校来开会的……”

人生多少际会,几度遭逢……

23、

中正的湖,一开始改造完毕的时候,我是极厌恶的。不仅变小了,原本很自然的泥土湖岸竟砌成水泥。加上中间的喷水管,使月眠湖彻头彻尾地变成了喷水池。

——一直觉得月眠湖这个名字起得真是好呀。 

今天去时,惊觉水泥岸上竟已郁郁葱葱,不知何时长出来的青草,不知何时长大的柳树。喷水管也不喷了,水面在微风吹拂下很自然地泛着涟漪。万里晴空,青葱草木,映在湖中,当真美不胜收。

水里的鱼安静地游着,我站在栏杆前安静地看着。

桓温曾经很感性地说:“草木犹此,人何以堪?”

果然七年之后,再次站在湖边栏杆前,是如此感慨万千。

24、

我知道我刚才写得太文艺矫情了。读中学和初院那四年,刚好是我最文艺矫情的四年。如今触景伤情,文艺矫情一番也不为过吧。

25、

学校有两个刚刚考过A level、在等成绩准备进教育学院的代课老师。算一下,她们应该比我小七岁。看起来还颇有稚气。使我倒退七年,我是否也这么稚气呢?

七年前的现在,我们刚进淡初。再过不久,我们经常一起吃饭的八个同学中,就有四个主席或队长了。

而现在,大家都在工作了。

我虽健忘,却还记得七年前的很多事。

26、

后天我就要主持生平第一个以负责老师身份办的活动了。校内书法比赛。只有不到二十个同学报名参加,甚是凄凉。

人数虽少,我还是颇为紧张。

上学时候以为自己已经老油条,踏入职场才知道自己很容易紧张。

27、

中正+南大校友Janice同学今天跟我说,她今天在general office,有个学生用华语问她问题,她用英语回答,结果招来某位大人物的批评:你身为英文老师,怎么可以容忍学生在你面前不讲英语?

我听了就郁闷了。我身为华文老师,是不是得要求学生在general office都要跟我讲华语?呵呵,下次我要在大人物在场的时候故意表演给她看。以下是剧本:

学生:Excuse me sir, blah blah blah

我:讲华语。

学生:Sorry sir, I can't speak Mandarin.

我:讲华语。

大人物:Why don't you answer him in English? This is not in classroom you know(她很喜欢说you know). 

我:对不起,我是华文老师,不能容忍学生在我面前说英语。

大人物:(听不懂)What???

阿Q剧本结束。嗯,满足了! 

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Sunday 27 January 2008

浅思录(二)

Posted in 文史哲, 有关食物 at 3:03 pm by 老貓 ·  · Comments · 

10、

煮饭做菜能给我很多成就感,尤其是自己发明自己试验的菜式,就算是不好吃,也甘之如饴。我认为烹调能让人转换脑筋。当然厨师除外,厨师应该找别的事情转换脑筋。

不太喜欢洗碗洗锅,所以基本上会尽量重复使用同样的器皿,以达到少洗的目的。这样貌似还跟统筹方法扯上关系……

11、

我的菜越做越清淡,最近两天已经发展到不用放盐了。唯一的佐料是油(油算佐料吧?),而且是没有味道的玉米油。

在学校里我吃咖喱面和放很多辣椒的椰浆饭,到家里却吃得超清淡。这是什么毛病?难道是因为在学校里节奏很快,风风火火,比较倾向火辣的东西。回到家,想要放松,就吃得很清淡?

12、

在这些清淡的菜中,我最喜欢的是涮黄瓜。就是把清水煮开,把切得薄薄的半透明的黄瓜片放进去涮一涮,马上捞起来。

黄瓜本可生吃,涮一涮算是向其他被煮熟的同志致敬。

13、

而对于蕃茄,我是两个极端,要么生吃,要么跟别的东西一起煮得面目全非。番茄若非生吃,那就要煮到烂了、煮到成酱了才好吃。 

生吃的时候当它是水果,煮熟的当它是蔬菜。如果说光有波粒二相,那番茄就是蔬果二相。

14、

人也有二相,一个是圣相,一个是兽相。良知是圣,本能是兽,唯有两者平衡,既不失于良知,又从乎本能,才是完整的人。

孔夫子说他到了晚年就可以随心所欲不逾矩。随心所欲就是从乎本能,但是他说的矩,却并非良知,而是道德。

道德这东西,只能用来自律,不能用来律人。夫子说的也就是自律,他的自律到什么程度呢,他不需要提醒自己,他在随心所欲的时候就可以做到不逾矩,也就是说他的所要“随”的“欲”本身就是在“矩”里面的。

这就是传说中的思想改造了:灵魂深处的一场革命。

15、

于是我就从做菜说到了道德。这叫做联想。联想公司有句广告词说:“如果人类失去了联想,世界将会怎样?”

如果人类失去了联想,世界将会怎样?世界不会怎样,会怎样的是人类。联想能力是知识的基础,没有了联想能力,也就没有了知识。没有知识的人类,就只不过是一个脆弱的哺乳物种。

不过,也许地球因此而得救也说不准。如果人类失去了联想,世界将变得更美好?

但人类的联想能力还是在的,尤其是我的联想能力。所以地球不会这么轻易得救。

16、

最近常常心情不好。心情不好,就看书,睡觉。

买了一本中英对照的新译本圣经。旧约中耶和华的斑斑劣迹,估计是我对基督教反感的最初原因。我本是喜欢新约的,假如旧约只剩下诗篇和雅歌,那该是多么美好。

但即使是新约也无法让我信基督教。喜欢归喜欢,我也是把耶稣放在佛陀同等的位置上。对佛教的近乎痴迷的热爱都无法让我信佛,何况只是喜欢半部圣经?

宗教对我而言只是有完整世界观和人物设定的魔幻世界罢了。

17、

人是衡量万物的尺度。这句话很意气风发,但也很傲慢。

18、

啊,我喜欢吃李子。刚刚成熟的李子。没有成熟的李子太涩,过于成熟的李子太软。只有刚刚成熟的李子又甜又脆,口感最好。

据说李子吃多了伤身。李子树下抬死人,这样的谚语应不是空穴来风。所以我一天只吃四个。

又查到梅子也可算是李子的一种。梅酒我很爱喝,不知道李子酒如何?李子,酒——这两个词都让我垂涎,合在一起那就更让我心向往之……

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Saturday 26 January 2008

浅思录(一)

Posted in 文史哲, 生活 at 11:03 pm by 老貓 ·  · 6 Comments · 

1、

因为上日语课,每个周六下午我都要到Bugis去。

在那个天天人潮汹涌的地方,在那个到处闪耀着货币光芒的地方,在那个华族、马来和西洋文化天衣无缝地结合起来的地方,我总是有种种异样的但又难以描述的感觉。

2、 

今天我似乎找到了一个可以描述这种感觉的词:异乡感。

我在Orchard会觉得自己是外星人,陌生、格格不入。我在Marine Parade、Jurong West和Tampines会觉得亲切,犹如自己的家。而在Bugis,我已十分熟悉那里的一切,我也并不觉得格格不入,然而仍旧会有异乡的感觉。

3、 

最主要的估计是,面对人潮,我会感到孤独。

当我还在矫情年代,“孤独”这两个字是我用得最多的。那时候我常常把“孤独”搞得很形而上,至今我还能想像当年一脸哲学家表情的自己。

那时候的“孤独”是一种姿态,自己摆出来的姿态。

现在的“孤独”纯粹是一种心情而已,是非常形而下的东西。

4、

我对故乡没有太多的归属感。我在乡下生活的回忆已经久远,我在城里没有把自己当作本地人。

我对新加坡的归属感也并不足够。我仍然习惯把自己当作外来者,虽然周围的人们都以为我是本地人或大马来的。

我的英语依然很差,我的华语还很中国,我不懂马来语,我几乎不说方言。

我关心中国新闻,虽然对新加坡新闻也很留意。我常常为中国现状发牢骚,却几乎从未争论过新加坡的任何政策。 

而且,我对榴莲不感冒。

5、

我讨厌中国政府,但仍旧喜欢中国文化;我嘴上说我不想做中国人,心里却还是把自己当作中国人看。

然而很明显,我已经不属于中国。因为我已经跟国内的人们脱离,在中国已经无法生存。

我又不属于新加坡。虽然我自认为很本地化,但从未把自己当本地人看。

我哪里都不属于。我哪里都没有归属感。我只是一个漂流在赤道上的孤魂野鬼。

我不是无根的浮萍,只不过我的根浮在空中,还残留着先前泥土的味道。

6、

忽然决定开始写《浅思录》。

我不喜欢《沉思录》和Meditation这样的名字。所以改成“浅思”。浅尝辄止是我的本性,也是我的优点;正因浅尝辄止,才不至于在什么地方走火入魔,不可自拔。

我又不喜欢《随笔集》、《随想录》这样的名字,因为我所写的并不怎么“随”。不论我多么想“随”,究竟还是“随”不了的。

7、

这个“随”,说的是天然。天然为美,然而真正的天然只能是“不着一字尽得风流”,因为天然本无字,人始为之。

所以只能说朴素为美,而且是习惯性的朴素,不是某时某地装出来的朴素。

8、

有人说我很谦虚。我认为我很爱说大话。比如我会说“xxx是我的优点”之类的话。

9、 

钱锺书为《管锥编》命名,说:“瞥观疏记,识小积多。学焉未能,老之已至!邃料简其较易理董者,锥指管窥,先成一辑。假吾岁月,尚欲赓扬。”这是谦虚。

而诸多出版物上的“为求内容详实、可靠,笔者尽可能地翻阅资料、详加修改,但因水平所限,纰漏在所难免,请各位读者批评指正”之类的话,那就不是谦虚,而几乎是免责条款了。

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Saturday 26 January 2008

科技部公众问答

Posted in 时事与政治 at 1:45 am by 老貓 ·  · 2 Comments · 

本来在科技部公众问答那里恶搞的人数不多,但前天由于和菜头的转摘,突然有大批人前往参与【注1】,后来被河蟹了——自从河蟹这个词被发明以来,第一次觉得河蟹有理。有些人一边骂政府高高在上漠视人民,一边对真正敬业、勤奋而且亲民的政府人员大加恶搞和嘲弄。

在“很黄很暴力”事件中,众多网民因为反感央视,于是把怨气发泄在一个小姑娘身上。如今,因为反感多数政府部门的无作为、没人性,于是尽情恶搞一个真正在办事的公众问答版。老祖先的智慧告诉我们,冤有头债有主,不爽谁就找谁掐架去,柿子捡软的捏算个什么鸟呢?

这也让我想起山西黑窑事件中,山西省长于幼军的遭遇。于幼军是任仲夷的高足,有学者身份,也是个行动派,在珠三角以改革派中坚闻名华南。刚到山西当省长不久,就发生了黑窑事件。省委书记保持缄默,作为二把手而且是上任不久的省长于幼军却出来道歉,其背后的政治斗争和压力可想而知。于是,在这风口浪尖上,网民的怒气就朝于幼军发泄了。话不必多说,当时凯迪猫眼的帖子就是见证。

那时候我的感想就是:你要官员出来道歉,好,道歉了,你又要骂道歉的人。你要官员负责,好,担子揽上了,你又不信任他。你要官员为民办实事,好,为民办实事的官员上任了,你又要他下台。你说天下的官儿一样脏,好不容易有个不脏的,你却要他引咎辞职甚至自杀以谢天下?

现在也是一样。 

广告过后是阴谋论时间。在“很黄很暴力”事件中,有这样一种论调:央视之所以那么做,是为了引起网民不满、恶搞、闹事,然后公安部可以抓现行,整顿网络言论。然后又有一个百尺竿头的阴谋论:网民们这么干,就是要让公安部动手,以便有攻击伟光正的理由。鸡蛋蛋鸡,按此循环下去,只能变得无聊透顶。

按照上面的逻辑,回头看科技部公众问答,或许也有一种阴谋论:网民们就是要让科技部网管删除捣乱帖,以便群起攻之——看,政府网站删除网民言论!

不过这只是我树的空靶子,因为似乎这样的情景并未出现。这又让我对这个国家的人们多了一些希望。

PS: to所谓的民主派/自由主义者/公民记者们【注2】:你可以说我是保皇党,可以说我听党妈妈的话,我无所谓。我的头上已经有“汉奸”、“卖国贼”、“热血爱国青年”、“左愤”、“右愤”、“中共走狗”、“五毛党”、“既得利益者”、“精英”、“民主派”、“自由派”、“保守派”、“保皇派”、“假洋鬼子”、“领美元的”【注3】等等的帽子和标签,多一个不多,少一个不少。 

【注1】可见和菜头的巨大影响力;当然也可能不是从和菜头那边过去的,因为和菜头的转摘也是二手消息了。

【注2】and whatever label you prefer 

【注3】对于“领美元的”这样的标签我是最生气的,为啥我一直没领到?许我一个美丽憧憬,却给我空空行囊!

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Monday 21 January 2008

What is an Agnostic?

Posted in 转载 at 9:28 pm by 老貓 ·  · 6 Comments · 

One of my favourite article by B. Russel. As an agnostic, I don't take the content of this article as unquestionable, standard or official; however, I have to admit, the views in this article is the closest to my own belief.


What is an Agnostic?

Bertrand Russell

What Is an agnostic?

An agnostic thinks it impossible to know the truth in matters such as God and the future life with which Christianity and other religions are concerned. Or, if not impossible, at least impossible at the present time.

Are agnostics atheists?

No. An atheist, like a Christian, holds that we can know whether or not there is a God. The Christian holds that we can know there is a God; the atheist, that we can know there is not. The Agnostic suspends judgment, saying that there are not sufficient grounds either for affirmation or for denial. At the same time, an Agnostic may hold that the existence of God, though not impossible, is very improbable; he may even hold it so improbable that it is not worth considering in practice. In that case, he is not far removed from atheism. His attitude may be that which a careful philosopher would have towards the gods of ancient Greece. If I were asked to prove that Zeus and Poseidon and Hera and the rest of the Olympians do not exist, I should be at a loss to find conclusive arguments. An Agnostic may think the Christian God as improbable as the Olympians; in that case, he is, for practical purposes, at one with the atheists.

Since you deny `God's Law', what authority do you accept as a guide to conduct?

An Agnostic does not accept any `authority' in the sense in which religious people do. He holds that a man should think out questions of conduct for himself. Of course, he will seek to profit by the wisdom of others, but he will have to select for himself the people he is to consider wise, and he will not regard even what they say as unquestionable. He will observe that what passes as `God's law' varies from time to time. The Bible says both that a woman must not marry her deceased husband's brother, and that, in certain circumstances, she must do so. If you have the misfortune to be a childless widow with an unmarried brother-in-law, it is logically impossible for you to avoid disobeying `God's law'.

How do you know what is good and what is evil? What does an agnostic consider a sin?

The Agnostic is not quite so certain as some Christians are as to what is good and what is evil. He does not hold, as most Christians in the past held, that people who disagree with the government on abstruse points of theology ought to suffer a painful death. He is against persecution, and rather chary of moral condemnation.

As for `sin', he thinks it not a useful notion. He admits, of course, that some kinds of conduct are desirable and some undesirable, but he holds that the punishment of undesirable kinds is only to be commended when it is deterrent or reformatory, not when it is inflicted because it is thought a good thing on its own account that the wicked should suffer. It was this belief in vindictive punishment that made men accept Hell. This is part of the harm done by the notion of `sin'.

Does an agnostic do whatever he pleases?

In one sense, no; in another sense, everyone does whatever he pleases. Suppose, for example, you hate someone so much that you would like to murder him. Why do you not do so? You may reply: "Because religion tells me that murder is a sin." But as a statistical fact, agnostics are not more prone to murder than other people, in fact, rather less so. They have the same motives for abstaining from murder as other people have. Far and away the most powerful of these motives is the fear of punishment. In lawless conditions, such as a gold rush, all sorts of people will commit crimes, although in ordinary circumstances they would have been law-abiding. There is not only actual legal punishment; there is the discomfort of dreading discovery, and the loneliness of knowing that, to avoid being hated, you must wear a mask with even your closest intimates. And there is also what may be called "conscience": If you ever contemplated a murder, you would dread the horrible memory of your victim's last moments or lifeless corpse. All this, it is true, depends upon your living in a law-abiding community, but there are abundant secular reasons for creating and preserving such a community.

I said that there is another sense in which every man does as he pleases. No one but a fool indulges every impulse, but what holds a desire in check is always some other desire. A man's anti-social wishes may be restrained by a wish to please God, but they may also be restrained by a wish to please his friends, or to win the respect of his community, or to be able to contemplate himself without disgust. But if he has no such wishes, the mere abstract concepts of morality will not keep him straight.

How does an agnostic regard the Bible?

An agnostic regards the Bible exactly as enlightened clerics regard it. He does not think that it is divinely inspired; he thinks its early history legendary, and no more exactly true than that in Homer; he thinks its moral teaching sometimes good, but sometimes very bad. For example: Samuel ordered Saul, in a war, to kill not only every man, woman, and child of the enemy, but also all the sheep and cattle. Saul, however, let the sheep and the cattle live, and for this we are told to condemn him. I have never been able to admire Elisha for cursing the children who laughed at him, or to believe (what the Bible asserts) that a benevolent Deity would send two she-bears to kill the children.

How does an agnostic regard Jesus, the Virgin Birth, and the Holy Trinity?

Since an agnostic does not believe in God, he cannot think that Jesus was God. Most agnostics admire the life and moral teachings of Jesus as told in the Gospels, but not necessarily more than those of certain other men. Some would place him on a level with Buddha, some with Socrates and some with Abraham Lincoln. Nor do they think that what He said is not open to question, since they do not accept any authority as absolute.

They regard the Virgin Birth as a doctrine taken over from pagan mythology, where such births were not uncommon. (Zoroaster was said to have been born of a virgin; Ishtar, the Babylonian goddess, is called the Holy Virgin.) They cannot give credence to it, or to the doctrine of the Trinity, since neither is possible without belief in God.

Can an agnostic be a Christian?

The word "Christian" has had various different meanings at different times. Throughout most of the centuries since the time of Christ, it has meant a person who believed God and immortality and held that Christ was God. But Unitarians call themselves Christians, although they do not believe in the divinity of Christ, and many people nowadays use the word "God" in a much less precise sense than that which it used to bear. Many people who say they believe in God no longer mean a person, or a trinity of persons, but only a vague tendency or power or purpose immanent in evolution. Others, going still further, mean by "Christianity" merely a system of ethics which, since they are ignorant of history, they imagine to be characteristic of Christians only.

When, in a recent book, I said that what the world needs is "love, Christian love, or compassion," many people thought this showed some changes in my views, although in fact, I might have said the same thing at any time. If you mean by a "Christian" a man who loves his neighbor, who has wide sympathy with suffering, and who ardently desires a world freed from the cruelties and abominations which at present disfigure it, then, certainly, you will be justified in calling me a Christian. And, in this sense, I think you will find more "Christians" among agnostics than among the orthodox. But, for my part, I cannot accept such a definition. Apart from other objections to it, it seems rude to Jews, Buddhists, Mohammedans, and other non-Christians, who, so far as history shows, have been at least as apt as Christians to practice the virtues which some modern Christians arrogantly claim as distinctive of their own religion.

I think also that all who called themselves Christians in an earlier time, and a great majority of those who do so at the present day, would consider that belief in God and immortality is essential to a Christian. On these grounds, I should not call myself a Christian, and I should say that an agnostic cannot be a Christian. But, if the word "Christianity" comes to be generally used to mean merely a kind of morality, then it will certainly be possible for an agnostic to be a Christian.

Does an agnostic deny that man has a soul?

This question has no precise meaning unless we are given a definition of the word "soul." I suppose what is meant is, roughly, something nonmaterial which persists throughout a person's life and even, for those who believe in immortality, throughout all future time. If this is what is meant, an agnostic is not likely to believe that man has a soul. But I must hasten to add that this does not mean that an agnostic must be a materialist. Many agnostics (including myself) are quite as doubtful of the body as they are of the soul, but this is a long story taking one into difficult metaphysics. Mind and matter alike, I should say, are only convenient symbols in discourse, not actually existing things.

Does an agnostic believe in a hereafter, in Heaven or Hell?

The question whether people survive death is one as to which evidence is possible. Psychical research and spiritualism are thought by many to supply such evidence. An agnostic, as such, does not take a view about survival unless he thinks that there is evidence one way or the other. For my part, I do not think there is any good reason to believe that we survive death, but I am open to conviction if adequate evidence should appear.

Heaven and hell are a different matter. Belief in hell is bound up with the belief that the vindictive punishment of sin is a good thing, quite independently of any reformative or deterrent effect that it may have. Hardly an agnostic believes this. As for heaven, there might conceivably someday be evidence of its existence through spiritualism, but most agnostics do not think that there is such evidence, and therefore do not believe in heaven.

Are you never afraid of God's judgment in denying Him?

Most certainly not. I also deny Zeus and Jupiter and Odin and Brahma, but this causes me no qualms. I observe that a very large portion of the human race does not believe in God and suffers no visible punishment in consequence. And if there were a God, I think it very unlikely that He would have such an uneasy vanity as to be offended by those who doubt His existence.

How do agnostics explain the beauty and harmony of nature?

I do not understand where this "beauty" and "harmony" are supposed to be found. Throughout the animal kingdom, animals ruthlessly prey upon each other. Most of them are either cruelly killed by other animals or slowly die of hunger. For my part, I am unable to see any great beauty or harmony in the tapeworm. Let it not be said that this creature is sent as a punishment for our sins, for it is more prevalent among animals than among humans. I suppose the questioner is thinking of such things as the beauty of the starry heavens. But one should remember that stars every now and again explode and reduce everything in their neighborhood to a vague mist. Beauty, in any case, is subjective and exists only in the eye of the beholder.

How do agnostics explain miracles and other revelations of God's omnipotence?

Agnostics do not think that there is any evidence of "miracles" in the sense of happenings contrary to natural law. We know that faith healing occurs and is in no sense miraculous. At Lourdes, certain diseases can be cured and others cannot. Those that can be cured at Lourdes can probably be cured by any doctor in whom the patient has faith. As for the records of other miracles, such as Joshua commanding the sun to stand still, the agnostic dismisses them as legends and points to the fact that all religions are plentifully supplied with such legends. There is just as much miraculous evidence for the Greek gods in Homer as for the Christian God in the Bible.

There have been base and cruel passions, which religion opposes. If you abandon religious principles, could mankind exist?

The existence of base and cruel passions is undeniable, but I find no evidence in history that religion has opposed these passions. On the contrary, it has sanctified them, and enabled people to indulge them without remorse. Cruel persecutions have been commoner in Christendom than anywhere else. What appears to justify persecution is dogmatic belief. Kindliness and tolerance only prevail in proportion as dogmatic belief decays. In our day, a new dogmatic religion, namely, communism, has arisen. To this, as to other systems of dogma, the agnostic is opposed. The persecuting character of present day communism is exactly like the persecuting character of Christianity in earlier centuries. In so far as Christianity has become less persecuting, this is mainly due to the work of freethinkers who have made dogmatists rather less dogmatic. If they were as dogmatic now as in former times, they would still think it right to burn heretics at the stake. The spirit of tolerance which some modern Christians regard as essentially Christian is, in fact, a product of the temper which allows doubt and is suspicious of absolute certainties. I think that anybody who surveys past history in an impartial manner will be driven to the conclusion that religion has caused more suffering than it has prevented.

What is the meaning of life to the agnostic?

I feel inclined to answer by another question: What is the meaning of `the meaning of life'? I suppose what is intended is some general purpose. I do not think that life in general has any purpose. It just happened. But individual human beings have purposes, and there is nothing in agnosticism to cause them to abandon these purposes. They cannot, of course, be certain of achieving the results at which they aim; but you would think ill of a soldier who refused to fight unless victory was certain. The person who needs religion to bolster up his own purposes is a timorous person, and I cannot think as well of him as of the man who takes his chances, while admitting that defeat is not impossible.

Does not the denial of religion mean the denial of marriage and chastity?

Here again, one must reply by another question: Does the man who asks this question believe that marriage and chastity contribute to earthly happiness here below, or does he think that, while they cause misery here below, they are to be advocated as means of getting to heaven? The man who takes the latter view will no doubt expect agnosticism to lead to a decay of what he calls virtue, but he will have to admit that what he calls virtue is not what ministers to the happiness of the human race while on earth. If, on the other hand, he takes the former view, namely, that there are terrestrial arguments in favor of marriage and chastity, he must also hold that these arguments are such as should appeal to the agnostic. Agnostics, as such, have no distinctive views about sexual morality. But most of them would admit that there are valid arguments against the unbridled indulgence of sexual desires. They would derive these arguments, however, from terrestrial sources and not from supposed divine commands.

Is not faith in reason alone a dangerous creed? Is not reason imperfect and inadequate without spiritual and moral law?

No sensible man, however agnostic, has "faith in reason alone." Reason is concerned with matters of fact, some observed, some inferred. The question whether there is a future life and the question whether there is a God concern matters of fact, and the agnostic will hold that they should be investigated in the same way as the question, "Will there be an eclipse of the moon tomorrow?" But matters of fact alone are not sufficient to determine action, since they do not tell us what ends we ought to pursue. In the realm of ends, we need something other than reason. The agnostic will find his ends in his own heart and not in an external command. Let us take an illustration: Suppose you wish to travel by train from New York to Chicago; you will use reason to discover when the trains run, and a person who though that there was some faculty of insight or intuition enabling him to dispense with the timetable would be thought rather silly. But no timetable will tell him that it is wise, he will have to take account of further matters of fact; but behind all the matters of fact, there will be the ends that he thinks fitting to pursue, and these, for an agnostic as for other men, belong to a realm which is not that of reason, though it should be in no degree contrary to it. The realm I mean is that of emotion and feeling and desire.

Do you regard all religions as forms of superstition or dogma? Which of the existing religions do you most respect, and why?

All the great organized religions that have dominated large populations have involved a greater or less amount of dogma, but "religion" is a word of which the meaning is not very definite. Confucianism, for instance, might be called a religion, although it involves no dogma. And in some forms of liberal Christianity, the element of dogma is reduced to a minimum.

Of the great religions of history, I prefer Buddhism, especially in its earliest forms, because it has had the smallest element of persecution.

Communism like agnosticism opposes religion, are agnostics Communists?

Communism does not oppose religion. It merely opposes the Christian religion, just as Mohammedanism does. Communism, at least in the form advocated by the Soviet Government and the Communist Party, is a new system of dogma of a peculiarly virulent and persecuting sort. Every genuine Agnostic must therefore be opposed to it.

Do agnostics think that science and religion are impossible to reconcile?

The answer turns upon what is meant by `religion'. If it means merely a system of ethics, it can be reconciled with science. If it means a system of dogma, regarded as unquestionably true, it is incompatible with the scientific spirit, which refuses to accept matters of fact without evidence, and also holds that complete certainty is hardly ever impossible.

What kind of evidence could convince you that God exists?

I think that if I heard a voice from the sky predicting all that was going to happen to me during the next twenty-four hours, including events that would have seemed highly improbable, and if all these events then produced to happen, I might perhaps be convinced at least of the existence of some superhuman intelligence. I can imagine other evidence of the same sort which might convince me, but so far as I know, no such evidence exists.

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Monday 21 January 2008

骑车上班

Posted in 生活 at 8:15 pm by 老貓 ·  · 4 Comments · 

今天第一次骑车上班。穿着西裤骑自行车,感觉很怪异。不过幸好不是山地车,不然就更怪了。

骑到学校一路上晨风习习,感觉舒畅,但一到学校下了车,才发现双脚酸麻。老了T_T

傍晚骑回家,那就更累了。在教室里站了几个小时,傍晚时路上又那么热,不累才怪呢。回到家,感觉就像在gym里跑了半小时的跑步机似的。

嗯,也就是说,这实在是个健身的好办法啊。但既然是健身,我能否坚持下去也就很可疑=。=

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Monday 21 January 2008

Should vs Need

Posted in 娱乐与动漫, 转载 at 8:04 pm by 老貓 ·  · Comments · 

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Monday 21 January 2008

马屁耶?反讽耶?

Posted in 文史哲, 时事与政治, 转载 at 2:02 pm by 老貓 ·  · Comments · 

此文获京华文学奖和首都地理文化作品奖。马屁是本意,反讽是副作用。


中南海记

(丁亥春,乡亲来信,因免农业税之事,群众感概万千,欲将民心石献与中央,嘱予作文以刻之,吾思量几日,决定以中南海为记。)

中南之海,语出元蒙;旧为皇家禁苑,今乃党政中央;红墙高门,庄严祥和。每逢艳阳当空,满园玉晖,草木葱茏;景致之美,无以言表。园中风物,可谓水清石正、楼廉台明、园博林大、殿高堂洁。吾以为,此四言所述,正乃民心所向,百姓所愿。

吾观其水,乃天下至清;曲水流觞,清醇如酒,举杯与天共饮;太液秋风,水榭流杯,临坐与地共赏;平湖碧波,莲荷滴翠,近前望之,清澈见底,群鱼在目,虫蛇无藏。

吾观其石,乃天下至正;园内建筑,用石万千,皆取于华夏诸省,经工匠凿打,千里运抵京城,再修边磨角,终成大料基石,其质坚实、其形方正,殿堂遂拔地而起。

吾观其楼,乃天下至廉;宝月镜光,新华南开,仰视俯察,洞明天下。又见倚丹补桐、日月祥辉、牣鱼闲行、群鸟端飞;政如其楼,廉则刚正永立,腐则朽败而塌。

吾观其台,乃天下至明;园内大台小台,光明透亮,植秀长春、八音克谐、盛夏结秀,怀抱仙蕉。翔鸾涵元、蓬莱紫光、待月迎薰,瀛台藻韵。此台如政台,台若暗,小人横行,台若明,贤才云集。

吾观其园,乃天下至博;纵览九州之园,何处躬耕,牵动天下;何处细织,绣锦中华。答曰:此园也。又问五湖之园,何处统合神州之物;何处凝聚亿万之心。答曰:此园也。丰泽万代,菊香满园,蜈蚣过桥跨寰宇,仙鹤渡海翔神州。

吾观其林,乃天下至大。智者入此林,必思天下事;仁者入此林,必爱天下人。静谷幽深,静心养气,三思为政;云岩毓秀,屏山镜水,随安稳坐;连理抱枝成整体,树木簇立成森林。

吾观其殿,乃天下至高;古语云:登殿者,须忧国民、坐殿者,须勤政治。景星仰月、香依庆云、千圣万善、武成文治。凡入此殿,忧民者,则为民拥,忧国者,则为国瞻。

吾观其堂,乃天下至洁;国之时事,民之大计,俱此议定。圣洁之堂,时刻清扫,永保一尘不染。颐年怀仁、春藕韵古、澄怀居仁、桂秀添香,堂角堂落光洁如新。

中南之海,非海而甚于海也。海之宽,纳百川,聚江河;此海之宽,与天和,与地睦,此乃国之伟大,民之友善也。海之动,大浪涌,波澜起;此海之动,轻波细浪,鹤翔鱼跃,此乃国之安定、民之和谐也。

(公元2007年7月陈恩田于北京)

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Tuesday 15 January 2008

转载:乡村里的德国教师

Posted in 转载 at 4:40 pm by 老貓 ·  · 7 Comments · 

摘自《读者》2005年第14期。

作者:董月玲

  卢安克是德国人,1968年出生在汉堡,是一对双胞胎中的弟弟。中学毕业后,他做过帆船厂的工人、帆船教练,当过兵,后进汉堡美术学院读工业设计。他头回到中国是旅游,后来到南京的东南大学和中国学生一起生活,因想跟中国学生同住,又转往广西的农业大学。

  1999年,他又从德国回到广西,跑到河池地区的一所县中学当初中教师,因为不能提高学生的考试分数,家长们有意见,学校把他开除了。

  为了能在贫困学校免费当老师,卢安克1999年成立了个办事处。

  2001年7月,卢安克把他的办事处搬到了广西东壮县坡拉乡建开村林广屯广拉队,这是一个不能电话,不通公路,村民只会说状语的偏僻小山村。

  一

  “那边的人都对我很好。不管我到哪个村,人家都已经知道我在免费教他们的子女。” 卢安克以办事处的名义派自己到下边当老师,不收钱。他非常喜欢去学生在山里的家,他去的学生家都是那种上面住人,下面住牲畜的房子,基本上没有电视机。因为缺床,他只能和学生挤一张床过夜。“‘五一’长假,整个星期我都在山里走,每天大概走两个小时的山路,每天晚上在不同的村我学生的家里住。” 卢安克发现在乡下,有50%的小孩不能上初中。

  他教的那个初中班,也是每隔几周就会少几个学生。特别是到了期终考,一些人什么也没说就突然不见了。

  “我的学生上学的目的是中考,如果中考每门课不能超过90分就上不了高中。我试过填写2001年的中考英文试卷,我估计自己连80分都得不到。”老师的工资要看学生的成绩,老师们为了自己的工资,只管有希望升学的学生。普通班是没有学生能考上高中的,他们对上高中已经不抱希望了。虽然人还在学校,可学生自己也不清楚再学下去是为了什么。学校里的生活跟他们在家里的生活是分开的,家长的意思则是:如果考不上大学,上学是没有什么用的。

  在广西当过几年老师的卢安克,对中国教育的印象是:教育,只是为了满足一种被社会承认的标准不是为了小孩。小孩在满足这个标准的过程中,脱离了他的天性,脱离了他的生活……

  “我的学生觉得自己不能成为学校和父母所期望的‘标准人’,他们不只是无法达到标准也交不起学校要求的费用。所以他们在离开我们班的时候,什么都不敢说。”

  “是他们不适合学校还是学校根本不是为他们办的?我再也不想参加这场‘淘汰赛’,我不想看到我的学生越来越少。反正他们只能被淘汰只有我到他们家里去,我才能找到他们。”

  卢安克自己跑到林广屯广拉队,向他学生的父亲租下一间没人住的泥瓦房作为办事处。

  二

  林广屯的广拉队是个自然村,只有150口人。

  “你在那个野蛮的地方,能搞什么教育?那里的人只会喝酒、打架,你连他们的话都听不懂。”县上的人说卢安克。

  他要教的学生甚至连小学都没上过。“这些上不了学的孩子,他们更需要我,而我下到底下去,工作也更加自由。我想专门研究这样一个问题:怎样的教育才能让小孩的身体、心理和精神获得健康。”

  卢安克在学生家里吃午饭,早晚也只有一种菜,比如红薯叶。

  “你能习惯这里的生活?”我问。

  “这里的人总是要请吃东西,不按时睡觉,还以喝酒的方式表示朋友关系,这些我不习惯,但其他的都习惯了。这边是酒文化家家酿米酒,有人天天喝醉。这里的小孩,天天都被无聊的人打。而小孩子,早已接受了这种没有道理的生活,习惯了被打。”

  开始时,村民常走进课堂,对卢安克说有很重要的事,叫他马上停课去帮忙。他跟去了,发现只不过是些大吃大喝的事。“我心里很生气不过因为太害羞,我也无法表现出来。”

  他还发现村里人特别爱热闹,很怕“闷”,而且也怕他“闷”。由于怕闷,这里的人喜欢把家进而搞得混乱不安。学生在作文中说,他们最喜欢这种乱的气氛。村民随时可以走进卢安克的房里把他的东西和工作搞乱。

  看见他一个人在山上或野地里边欣赏大自然的安静,边写书,老乡就以为他很闷,过来跟他聊天,“帮”他解闷。“我怎么会闷?每天都要思考很多问题,考虑怎么能通过教育改变社会和环境,我不是怕闷,而是怕找不到安静的地方做我的研究。我觉得,只因为不喜欢思考问题,他们才会闷,在一种乱七八糟的气氛中,人无法做任何更改的思考。”

  卢安克解释说:“人类的发展,最早是没有个人的,就是说有个人的身体,但没有个人的思想、意识。人都是依赖环境、依赖团体的。这里的人现在还是这个样子。如果问一个学生你想怎么样?他就无法回答。他们全都靠环境,环境是怎样的他们就怎样,不相信有任何改变。

  我问他:“你是一个人,而他们是一群体,淬的是几千年的习惯和传统,你语言又不通,能改变得了他们?”

  “如果仅仅靠教育手段,是改变不了。我改变他拉的方式可能是跟他们一起生活,我要让他们看到,在同样的环境中,我能做跟环境不同的东西。他们可能从没想到,一个人还可以做跟环境不同的事情。他们看到了,就会想为什么他能做到,而我做不到?比如他们喝酒、打牌时我在写书。”

  过了3个月,村里人再也不请卢安克旷课去喝酒了。那些喝醉酒的人,每次见到他会不好意思地说:“呵,我已经喝够了!”

  “他们已经知道,他们的看法,不是惟一一种,以前他们想不到其他的。通过我的生活方式,能改变他们多一点。教育跟老师的生活是分不开的,教育跟生活本身也是分不开的。”

  三

  为了怕老乡们误会,开课前,卢安克曾给学生深长写了几条事项:

  开展教育活动不是办学,参加活动的小孩不能拿到任何毕业证书。教师不接受任何费用,需要的只是给卢安克吃饭(不吃肉)。另外,活动也不能直接给参加活动的小孩带来任何经济上的好处。

  开展的教育活动不是老师讲课,也不是学生听课,更不是分开上不同的课。开展的活动是要大家一起实践的项目,项目就是孩子自己想出来的梦。

  来上课的,全是没上过学的女孩,而且不懂普通话,只能说状语,而卢安克又听不懂状语,只能说普通话。开始几天,有大人帮忙翻译,但他们理解不了卢安克的想法,总是对学生说:“看,卢安克多伟大,他来这里和我们一起生活,解决文盲问题,让我们村富裕起来。”

  “我不是来扶贫的。” 卢安克说,“如果只帮他们赚钱回来,村里得到的变化只是不用再那么辛苦地从早到晚干活,以前的生活任务没了,可能赋予生活意义的新的任务又没有。结果,他们的心里会越来越空虚、脆弱和不健康。”

  卢安克问他的新学生:“你们有什么想法,有什么梦想?”结果帮他翻译的人翻成:“你们都要坐在这里,老师在那边给你们教,你们好好听他的。”

  一开始,听卢安克总是问这类问题学生便跟村里人抱怨说:唉!上一小时课,还不如干10小时活呢,上课太累!

  自打卢安克开课起,他的家就成了村里的“热点”,非常闹哄。

  “第一个月,屯里和屯外的大人跑来看我搞什么。我不认识的大人在我上课时,站在旁边大声地讨论也大声地对我的学生说话。大人对学生说:这种教法没有用。我和学生请大人安静时,他们又说:我们是本村人,我们就随便一点吧!在我们的‘教室’里,最安静的人可能就是我。甚至在我的课上,我也经常没机会说话。有时,因为教室里喝醉的人声音太吵,我们只能提前下课。要是我们换一个地方,他们也跟着我们。”

  为了让学生勇敢地讲出心里话,他不让学生坐在下面望着老师而是一起围着张大桌子。大人们来了说:“这样不行,你不能和学生一起坐在一个桌子边。你必须用黑板,这样才像学校。课本在哪儿?你不能没有课本!”

  过了两个月,大人们的好奇心才过去,但他的学生举却越来越大。卢安克先从拼音开始教学生普通话。因为停电,他们每晚点柴油灯上课。在掌握一些拼音的基本知识后,他让每个学生讲出自己的故事,翻译成普通话,由卢安克用拼音记下来。这样,每个学生都有一篇和别人不一样的拼音课文。因为是自己的故事,所以很熟悉,练习念时,不用说出课文的意思,她们已经知道了。

  一个学生说:“我很悲痛,我想能去哪里读一点书?小时候我部爸爸要钱去读书,可家里没有钱。看到别人读书,自己心里非常难过。六七岁,我就劳动放牛。我很想读书,可是没有机会,没有钱,使我吃不下饭。能遇到你这种好人,来免费教书,我感到无比激动。最后,我希望你教我一口流利的普通话,成为一个有礼貌、懂道理的人。”

  其他学生说她们怎么去外面办事,因为不懂普通话就找不到回家的车,或者她们怎么到镇里去卖水果,由于没有学过算术而受骗。

  “我的学生这样写出的文章,虽然没有普通小学生写得好,不过比他们更能表达真正的自己的东西。过了一段时间,学生一起来写《喝醉的人》《抽烟的人》《赌博的人》《打电脑的人》等文章并练习念。”

  卢安克还说,城里孩子缺的是动手,可农村孩子缺的是独立思考的计划工作。“所以,学生告诉我学普通话是为了去打工时,我就让她们用讲述的方式计划她们梦想的整个工厂”。

  第一天的题目是《工人的希望和老板的希望》。下面几天还写了《做什么产品,什么好卖》《需要提供什么工作条件让工人发挥他们的力量》《生产过程不同的任务和使用工人的才能》《工厂部门的合作方式》。最难的事是,让学生意识到她们自己的特长。

  “我想让学生先发现自己的任务,再发明,最后才让她们跟自己做出的结果接触。我认为从青春期开始,任务是每个人自己才会发现的,再也不可能由别人安排。什么是她们的路和任务,我不可能知道。

  四

  卢安克现在的开销是父母给的,每年4800元人民币,其中22%用于复印资料寄给别人,40%用于捐款,38%为学生和他个人用。

  我问卢安克:“你认为什么样的生活是有价值的?”

  “做到别人不能做或不愿意做的事,我就有了价值。”他答。

  “做了这些事后,你自己有什么收获吗?”

  “收获蛮多的。发现了很多问题而且能找到解决的方法。”

  “有了结果又会怎样?”我接着问。“我就写在书上,发表到我的网页上,让别人知道,别人能利用。”每隔10天卢安克离开屯里两天,去县城的网吧上网,他有自己的网页和邮箱。他说自己的书,主要是想让老师们看。“综合实践课,这个课的名字起得很好,但老师们都不知道该怎么上,我想帮中国发展教育。” 卢安克还说,每隔半年,他都往有关的教育部门寄一次他的研究成果,但没人理他。

  我问卢安克:“你为啥不跟一些国际组织或政府部门合作,这样不就解决经济问题了?”

  “我不需要很多钱,我研究的那个东西,有钱也没有用。也可以说是精神的研究,物质帮不上忙。”

  他又说:“如果我有钱,或我有权来安排钱,会有越越来越多的人找我,我就没法安静做我的研究。他们和我接触时,为了得到好处,也可能变得不老实,我就无法研究他们需要什么教育了。

  曾有人想让卢安克当“青年志愿者”,希望他成为广西第一个外国志愿者,还打算让他参与大量公开的宣传活动。

  “要我参加各种各样有吸引力、注意力的活动,我一听,心里就不舒服。我要做真正的工作并需要安静。我更不想参加那种好看的、没有什么帮助的活动还说要经常到大饭店里的活动中心去,我在那里除了浪费国家的钱以外还能做什么?我还听说很多学校付不起志愿者的保险费,还听说共青团发工资给我。我怎么能当这样的志愿者?

  现在,林广屯的人习惯了有卢安克的生活。

  “刚开始常常影响我上课的人,现在天天来关心学生有没有上课,因为他们觉得,没有我们的活动,好像村里少了什么似的。”

  我问卢安克有什么打算?

  “我想以后不教普通话,不教项目外的东西,而是全部做项目,在活动的过程中教她们。项目是根据学生的才能,根据环境的需要来定,我还想在坡拉乡,再多几个村子来做。”

  卢安克还告诉我,一旦他和学生找到了要做的项目,他的双胞胎哥哥卢安思也会来。

  “他参加了绿色和平组织,负责攀登和拍摄,要爬到大厦、核电站、美国军舰上搞,拍摄的东西是直播的,他常常被人家抓。”

  我问他,你哥哥来了能做些什么呢?“他除了不能讲中文外,其他的都可以做,他会待上半年。”

  3月4日,卢安克告诉我:书稿改完了,身体完全康复了,马上就动身回林广屯。

  卢安克,一个德国人,以一人之力,在做中国教育最需要但没有人做的事!

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